Spock and Kirk get it on
by DoctorScrew
Summary: pretty much what is says in the title. My first Smut fic. its a spoof, hope you like it. not very long leave a review, thanks!


Jim Kirk sat lazily slopped in his captains chair, with his elbow resting on the arm and his chin resting in his hand. The crew of the enterprise was quiet today, everyone was quietly getting on with their jobs in peace and no trouble seemed like it would strike any time soon.

Paperwork was the dominant theme in the ship today.

He breathed an impatient sigh as he slowly swivelled his chair to observe his crew.

Chekov, Sulu and Uhura were contently typing away, pressing buttons and filling out forms. His eyes looked over to Spock, who was standing up straight looking ahead in the direction of the window. No doubt he was already done with all of his paperwork.

Kirks eyes purposely locked onto him.

Spock made eye contact and quickly darted his vision away with a slight frown, looking uncomfortable as always.

Kirk tried to suppress the smile forcing its way onto his lips.

Spocks constant confusion and awkwardness towards understanding human body language was entertaining enough to get him though any amount of paper work that could be thrown at him.

Teasing him was as easy as sending a cheeky wink in his direction when nobody was looking, and he would panic and squirm with confusion and lack of rule following.

A moment passed and Spock turned to face Kirk.

"Excuse me, captain" he said giving a slight nod, excusing himself from the room. He turned and walked towards the door.

Kirk frowned to himself. Where did he think he was running off too so fast?

A few minuets past and Kirk tapped his foot impatiently. Spock had been gone a while now.

He stood up from his chair and some of the crew members looked up at him, waiting for orders.

"As you were" his said, and left the room.

He wandered around for a while and there was no sign of Spock in any of the corridors.

He sighed and leaned against the clean white wall, thinking.

He looked to his right and realised he was standing right next to Spocks room. Another smile crept onto his lips and he let himself in.

"Spock?" he called as he entered.

Spock was standing in front of a desk in the corner of the room, filled with neatly piled papers and different coloured files.

He turned to face the door with a confused frown on his face.

"Capitan?" he said.

Kirk let himself in fully and closed the door behind him.

"whata' you doing, Spock?" he asked

Spock was standing straight with his hands held behind his back.

"I am reorganising my files in a more logical manor" he went on, as Kirk walked towards him eyeing the desk. "As it became apparent to me that my assistance was no longer needed-"

"Shut up Spock" Interrupted Kirk, picking up a folder, inspecting it and then throwing it to the side.

Spock quickly shut his mouth and gave another frown.

"Captain, according to rule 7.30 of starfleet guidelines it is against rules for a captain to be in any of the rooms of his crew memb-"

"don't worry about it." he interrupted again in a relaxed manor, leaning against Spocks desk.

Spock paused again.

"is there any thing I can help you with?" he asked, rather impatiently.

Kirk smiled and shot him a quick wink. "well that depends what your willing to do"

Spock frowned another highly amusing confused frown.

"Capitan, I find these remarks highly inappropriate."

"jeez, lighten up Spock." said Kirk "I'm only trying to have some _fun_" he moved closer to Spock as he spoke and flicked him in the ear playfully.

Spock started to look impatient with Kirks teasing and spoke with an authoritative tone.

"Captain I-" he began

"You just don't get it, do you Spock?" said Kirk impatiently. Spocks head tilted to the side as he spoke.

"I'm afraid I do not, captain."

"_Jesus Christ_ Spock, I _want_ you" Spocks eyes widened in shock but before he could protest Kirk pulled him in and pressed their lips together.

Their bodies were pressed tightly together and suddenly everything finally made sense to Spock.

He collected his wits and pushed the captain back by his shoulders.

"_Jim_" He said with a shocked and horrified expression. "This goes against all regulations and is highly illogical"

"Forget the damn rules!" shouted kirk as he pulled him in once again. This time Spocks eyes were closed and he held is captain tightly, pressing closer to him. He frowned again and pushed him away.

"But Uhura" He said in a quiet voice.

"Don't worry" rushed Kirk "Its even, I'm already fucking her"

He suddenly realised what he had just said and his eyes widened as he took in the expression on Spocks face. His mind quickly raced back to all of the other times he had pissed Spock off too much and the beating that always followed.

"WHAT?" Shouted Spock. His face was filled with rage and he gripped Kirk by his shirt, practically lifting him up and slamming him against the wall.

_Oh fuck. Oh fuck. I fucked up._ Thought Kirk as he closed his eyes and tensed, waiting for the first hit.

He could hear his heavy breathing and his chest already ached from where he was pushing him so roughly to the wall.

He felt Spock pull him in and crash their lips together in a frenzy of passion and anger. He relaxed with relief and let his hands wander up to Spocks neck, pulling him in closer.

Spocks hands worked their way down kirks chest and under his shirt, pulling it off. Their lips only parted for a second as they stripped each other down and made their way to the bed in the centre of the room, leaving their uniforms spread messily all over the floor.

Spock pushed him onto the bed and climbed on top of him.

"Take me" whispered Kirk

"Yes, _Capitan_" smiled Spock

And he totally did.


End file.
